Walking around the Choate campus, an outsider can’t help but see diversity, an accepting community brightened by many different backgrounds, identities, and experiences. As Choate students, we have the unique opportunity to learn about, and engage with, those different from ourselves, whether that be through a common interest, classes, or sports teams. And yet many students find themselves in friend groups filled with people just like them. As we reflect on our conversations from Diversity Day, now is the perfect time to expand friend groups and further explore our differences.
For first-year students adjusting to Choate, many are more comfortable surrounding themselves with those similar to them. Whether united by hometown or race and ethnicity, humans have a natural tendency to cling to those who are alike them. Especially during the transition to Choate, it is easy to become friends with those with similar backgrounds.
Despite many on-campus activities, most of the socializing at still Choate happens off-campus. A lot of money is spent on Ubers, shopping, restaurants, and day trips, creating expenses that not everyone can afford. While some individuals do not need to think twice about money and are unrestricted in their options for fun, if one does not have the money to hang out with the people with whom they would like to connect with, it is more difficult to form connections. Slowly and unintentionally, kids with more limited funds start being left out of activities, remaining stuck on campus while their friends are out watching a movie or taking a train into New York City. These dynamics lead to friendship groups being determined by financial status. There is nothing wrong with going out with your friends on the weekends, but we are in a unique environment that allows us to interact with people from different walks of life, so going into town with the same few friends every weekend is a missed opportunity to broaden your perspective and become friends with someone despite the size of their bank accounts.
The point is that we at Choate need to actively seek discomfort more often. Continuing to do what feels “comfortable” discourages an ability to empathize with, and understand, those who are different. These skills are essential for developing a more comprehensive and globally aware mindset.
Open-mindedness is something that is developed through unfamiliar interactions and connections. Diversity Day offered all of us an opportunity to take a step toward diversifying our connections. So, take some time to consider the makeup of your friendship circles. How can you broaden your friend groups? Observe. Reflect. Be proactive. Make the most of your time at this uniquely diverse place.
