Page From Headmistress Caroline Ruutz-Rees’s letters to Rosemary Hall Girls, Nov. 15, 1905
(from Letters to Rosemary 1905-1906)
I’m riddled with the plague of self-doubt. Whether I’m in a music practice room or in an empty dance studio, I am always aware of my flaws: be it a missed harmonic on the violin, or an unpointed foot. Even during a performance, when I am supposed to let go and bare all, I am only conscious of the potential moments I could screw up. Confidence has also been an issue in my day-to-day life. People don’t realize that we are performing all the time — every choice we make, from the clothes we wear to the things we say, adds to our daily performance. The constant worrying of people’s perceptions of me and how I appear in public robs me of the ease and freedom of being myself. I was inspired by the letters of late headmistress Caroline Ruutz-Rees because she often used words to uplift her students. She urged the importance of staying true to self. The message for confidence needs to be retold for every teenager who uses this time in their life to figure out the intricacies of their identity. We need to recognize the validity in all of our dreams, passions, and weaknesses— however unique they may be.
