“Anyways, that brings us to today — I have for you all 25 tips for success at Choate.
1. Don’t be afraid to go to the gym because everyone’s looking at themselves so much they won’t even notice you.
2. Dining hall traffic can be avoided by staring straight ahead, walking quickly, and pretending you are late to class needed to print something.
3. Wait three seconds — one, two, three — before saying hi to someone on the path so you don’t seem too interested.
4. Don’t bring pizza to campus during Covid-19 quarantines at Choate and then wave to your dean or you may get suspended. Sorry about that Ms. Van Mierlo
5. Dining hall coffee may not taste good but it’s unbeatable for mobilization purposes. If you know what I’m talking about you know what I’m talking about.
6. The walk from Gunpowder Creek to the fourth floor of humanities cannot be done in less than six minutes.
7. If you’re a day student or have a house nearby, host your boarder friends because sometimes all they need is a home cooked meal
8. Although my boob bag may get me compliments, I’ve officially decided tote bags are not functional for school and I will be getting a backpack for next year.
9. Be your own person even though the blondes keep getting blonder.
10. RESIST YOUR FOMO, there will always be more social events.
11. We’re all just teenagers
12. Stay off TikTok if it makes you feel bad. I’m talking to all 850 of you.
13. Be close to the people on your sports teams. You guys are there to win and compete but also to bond and be there for each other.
14. We are all better than someone else at something and so comparing does no good.
15. If nobody else is hosting or making plans, JUST DO IT!
16. Stay on the lookout for things that you might be interested in. Freshman me did not think I would have 48 plants in my bedroom or 36,000 photos on my camera roll but look at me now.
17. Being a day student actually does get so much better if you get a car.
18. And on that note — You can drive from the day students parking lot to the Shell gas station on zero miles of gas.
19. If you’re going to go out with someone make sure to treat each other well.
20. As you get older, the line in the servery becomes a lot more optional.
21. The friendships you make here will go in phases but that’s just high school.
22. New York long weekends are not actually forgive and forget.
23. Say what’s on your mind, and if others don’t agree, that’s their problem.
24. Colony dinner has the best French toast, and I will forever miss doing brunches there.
25. Give Choate your all. The four years go by quickly and when you’re done you’re going to want more.”
